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10:08 pm
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Its my Birthday!!!
OK I know I only post about once every six months but you all still love me anyway right!?!
More importantly it is my birthday in 2 weeks (21st July) and I would really like to see everyone. My plan is to go out for a meal and drinks on the friday 20th, probably to Old Orleans. I know poaching off ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) faeriecween but I really liked that purple cocktail.
Before you all start screaming in anguish I know that Harry Potter comes out that night but not till midnight so you can all come with me for a pre-Harry Potter dinner at about 7.30, and then run off when it is time to go and pick up your copy.
If anyone has any better ideas about where to go I am always interested.
Hopefully I will see you all there.
Current Location: my bedroom
Current Mood:  hopeful
Current Music: Angel playing games on his phone
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07:28 pm
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I'm not dead!!!!!
For those who care just to let you know I am not dead. The rumors of my demise have been much exaggerated. I have been a combination of sick and very busy which is why it has been quite so long since my last post. For those of you who don't know I have had this weird inner ear thing which apart from making me feel like I have drunk way too much alcohol but without any of the fun bit, it has made working on a computer a literally nauseating experience. As I work all day on a computer I didn't fancy sea sickness when I got home.
Apart from the bad I have a wonderful boyfriend who has been looking after me through all the bad things. My sister has had a baby and will be arriving here, from Israel, with my little nephew in a few hours (I haven't seen him yet but I will post pics when I have them).
I don't really have anything else interesting to say now except we may go to chillis for faeriecween's birthday as they do at least 3 different versions of a Long Island Ice Tea and they are all good!!!
Current Location: The moon
Current Mood:  drained
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09:12 pm
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Who am I?
This last few months I have changed. In fact I'm not sure I know who the real me is because it seems to be different from one day to the next. But recently I have lost even the things that I considered fundamental to who I was. I have let down friends and been selfish because I felt I had reached a point where I could not give any more of myself and survive. Today I realised where this had all come from. I should, no want to be there for my friends when they are in need, and I haven't been. I thought the bitching had got me down and that I didn't have the strength to deal with it any longer but I was wrong.
I have come to realise the only thing that is really stopping me from being who I want to be is stress. This stress does not come from my friends the sweet wonderful people who from time to time need my support. It comes from my job. Not the work, though that can take a lot out of me and make me tired, but the constant bitching and whining from the people around me. from 7.30 in the morning till 6 at night all I hear is people complaining and this has left me unsympathetic and a little mean. But I am not taking my frustration out on the people who cause me the trouble but my friends.Now I complain constantly about my job and don;t make time to listen to the people who really need me to.
It is funny most people blame the fact I am no longer around on myt new relationship, and I will admit that it takes up alot of my time but it is not the cause. I realised this evening just how much I care about the man I am with and just how much I would give up if he needed me to. That train of thought just lead me to realising how much of the person I used to be I had given up especially when it comes to my friends. I had allowed my self to go down the wrong path. the people who need me do not want me to fix there problems, to make every thing better with one grand gesture, they just need me there.
I would like all who read this to take it as an apology for any time they have felt slighted by me I never meant you to. Please know that I love you and I wish to become a better person, or at least make it back to who I used to be.
Current Location: Home
Current Mood:  contemplative
Current Music: Save the Last Dance on TV
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08:54 pm
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Ok so I'm crap!
I figure by now as I'm actually online for more than about 3 minutes (you should have seen the state of my inbox) I will actually say what I have been up to.
I did it after months of waiting and going out of my mind I finally managed to land the most amazing man in the world. For those of you that don't know I am going out with Angel the sweet biker who took me out a few times. Things couldn't be better, I know the shininess will wear off eventually but for once I'm not waiting for that to happen and am just enjoying the fact that he seems perfect. I had a crappy day at work yesterday to the point I could not face going to the pub, especially with all the bitching and ranting that is going on at the moment (why do they come to me do you not realise I really don't want to know, just get over it the lot of you!). But he came to my house lay me down on the sofa with my head on his lap and stroked my hair till I felt better. then he bought me pizza and let me stuff myself with comfort food (now I have that 5kg back again, well I knew they couldn't stay lost for too long).
As I'm sure you can tell the wonderful boyfriend has been taking up a lot of my time so I haven't really been out and not have any time for the internet. Shocking I know but that's how much I like him.
Besides that I have not been up to much my job still sucks but I might have an interview for a new one on friday. And I need to start being a better friend as I have not been around for those who need me as much as I should.
Now it is time for dinner!
Current Location: Home
Current Mood:  hungry
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08:43 pm
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6 random things about me
As requested 6 things about me.
1) I am almost incapable of getting angry (please don't test this). I get pissed off but I never get really angry.
2) I am a big fan of Piglet (not pigs just Piglet).
3) I am afraid of stairs. No problem with heights I just have a fear of going down stairs.
4) I have a stuffed cat named kitty who sleeps in my bed (unless anyone else is there to keep me company).
5) I always have to wash my hands before I go to sleep and as soon as I wake up in the morning (don't ask me why).
6) I have lost 5kg in the last 4 months without even trying (I found out yesterday when I went to the doctors).
I know I'm supposed to tag 6 people but I don't know 6 people on lj let alone 6 that haven't done it yet. pipdragonborne can do it though.
Current Location: Home
Current Mood:  anxious
Current Music: Silence
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10:22 pm
[Link] | | Your Aura is Blue | 
Spiritual and calm, you tend to live a quiet but enriching life.
You are very giving of yourself. And it's hard for you to let go of relationships.
The purpose of your life: showing love to other people
Famous blues include: Angelina Jolie, the Dali Lama, Oprah
Careers for you to try: Psychic, Peace Corps Volunteer, Counselor |
Current Mood: sleepy
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10:03 pm
[Link] | | You Are a Dreaming Soul | 
Your vivid emotions and imagination takes you away from this world
So much so that you tend to live in your head most of the time
You have great dreams and ambitions that could be the envy of all...
But for you, following through with your dreams is a bit difficult
You are charming, endearing, and people tend to love you.
Forgiving and tolerant, you see the world through rose colored glasses.
Underneath it all, you have a ton of passion that you hide from others.
Always hopeful, you tend to expect positive outcomes in your life.
Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul, Prophet Soul, and Traveler Soul |
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09:50 pm
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Any one else surprised?
| You scored as Air. You're element is Air. You are like a mixture of everything. You are calm but when angry you can loose your temper fast.
Air | | 100% | Water | | 83% | Darkness | | 75% | Earth | | 50% | Light | | 50% | Fire | | 8% | </td>
What kind of element are you?
created with QuizFarm.com |
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09:48 pm
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Huh?
 | You scored as Gunshot. Your death will be by gunshot, probably because you are some important person or whatever. Possibly a sniper, nice, quick, clean shot to the head. Just beautiful.
Gunshot | | 87% | Natural Causes | | 73% | Suicide | | 73% | Bomb | | 73% | Posion | | 67% | Suffocated | | 53% | Eaten | | 53% | Stabbed | | 53% | Cut Throat | | 40% | Disease | | 40% | Disappear | | 33% | Accident | | 33% | Drowning | | 27% | </td>
How Will You Die??
created with QuizFarm.com |
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09:43 pm
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What Colored Lightsaber Would You Have?
Green is your Lightsaber's color.Green is the color of nature. It symbolizes growth, harmony, and freshness. Green has strong emotional correspondence with safety. Green is also commonly associated with wealth and happiness, so someone with a green lightsaber like yourself is a fortunate soul.
Take this quiz!
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09:37 pm
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And another one
 | You scored as The Holly. In Celtic astrology, you're a Holly. The animal symbol that accompanies this tree is the unicorn. The ancient Druids say Holly people are cautious, capable, steadfast, efficient, supportive and protective. However, Hollies may be prone to perfectionism, loss of direction and possessiveness, especially toward people.
The Holly | | 95% | The Ivy | | 80% | The Reed | | 70% | The Rowan | | 70% | The Birch | | 60% | The Oak | | 60% | The Vine | | 60% | The Elder | | 55% | The Hawthorn | | 55% | The Ash | | 55% | The Hazel | | 50% | The Willow | | 50% | The Alder | | 35% | </td>
What Tree Are You? (Celtic astrology)
created with QuizFarm.com |
Current Mood: tired
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09:31 pm
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Is anyone surprised?
 | You scored as Female. Being mostly female by thought, is even though (still) considered inferior to masculinity in Western culture, a good thing in many ways:By definition it means that you are more creative, and sensitive towards your environment, enabling you to express yourself freely.
Female | | 82% | Either | | 39% | Male | | 36% | Neither | | 11% | </td>
Should you be MALE or FEMALE?*
created with QuizFarm.com |
Current Mood:  hot
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07:00 pm
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My Birthday Weekend
This post is really just a big thank you to all the people who help to make my birthday wonderful. I have had a truly fantastic weekend. It all started on thursday night when byteback and pipdragonborne came up to my house for poker and cocktails (which left the Alice pissed and very poor). But I suppose it is about time they beat me at poker, I have been trouncing them for weeks.
My birthday was friday and I was not allowed to plan things for myself. I was sent to the pub while they planned the rest of the evening which was really nice as I got to see faeriecween and we went and bought me a coffee machine (thanks to Mel's birthday present). I then had a lovely dinner in Bella Italia with Pip, Rob and Angel, and back to mine for more cocktails. I couldn't have been more lucky on the weather. The biggest thunder storm you have seen in this country comes rolling over my house. Five storms converging directly over my house it was incredible. Big thank you to whatever deity may have arranged that.
Saturday after a sleepy day I found myself teaching poi in the tuc, which was kinda weird as I have only been doing it myself for a month or so, but still fairly cool. Even better was Angel giving me a ride home on his bike. I am now back to begging for him to take me out as soon as he can and now I desperately want a bike of my own (anyone feel a bank loan coming on).
Current Location: Home
Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Ultraviolet on TV
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09:08 pm
[Link] | Ok so I realise I have been totally crap and haven't posted in over a month but hopefully this will make up for it. I have weirdly spent all my time out but still managing to be a hermit, as I think only a very small number of people have actually seen me.
Where to begin?
My job has been going surprisingly well, I have been training the new guy on my team which is kinda funny as until he started I was the new person. The training stuff is cool though and not just because I get to spend all day not doing any work just pointing out when someone else does it wrong (ok not quite my training is better than that, I even made him note on how to do some stuff). The fact that I'm almost enjoying my job is kind of a shame though, as I am likely to stop working there by this time next month as my contract is going to run out and I'm not sure they are able to give me a new one with all the changes that are happening to the company. But that may simply be an opportunity for me to find a job I really love rather than one I don't hate (or at least one I don't hate that pays me more!).
Besides work I have been spending my time sat by the river having picnicks and learning to do poi. I'm actually getting good(ish) at it but I think that is mostly down to Pip the girl who is teaching me. My weekends may sound a little boring but all the drama of last month I am really enjoying it. My life has become quite and almost boring, this must be the best thing that has happened to me in ages.
I went shopping on saturday and got the most fantastic dress to wear to Swampy and Clare's wedding (will post pics). It was great I get these bonus points from work so I spent £100 in Debanhams and it was all FREE! Really looking forward to the wedding though. Loads of people are going and some of them I don't get to see any more it will be nackering as it is in Cornwall and I can't get any time off work but still fun will be had. And byteback is coming so I don't need to feel like the single girl (even if I will be).
I think this little essay is enough for now but I will try and be good and post more often.
Current Location: Home
Current Mood: calm
Current Music: Apoptygma Berzerk
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05:42 pm
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Its true I really am Piglet
Current Mood: cheerful
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04:51 pm
[Link] | I have not posted in ages and now as I do it I realise I have nothing of interest to say. I have been sick this week so not in work since monday and with it I have not left the house. It has made me realise how quickly things change in my world as in only four days as I languish in bed, a lot has apparently happened.
Despite having been isolated and alone (which I am very bad at) for the last few days I have realised certain things. I cannot call them epiphanies as faeriecween has had, as mine have come to me slowly over the course of the last few weeks. I to have realised that I have amazing friends and that while we may be dysfunctional I feel at home again, something I never thought I would. Along with this I have realised I am happy. I have not beaten my depression it is (and probably always will be) still there but I do not mind. I now have people who will take care of me and know me for who I really am and love me inspite of everything.
Finally I realised that it is time for me to stop waiting for my life to start. This is my life and I like it what I have here and now is everything I want.
Hopefully I will be well by the weekend and able to go out and be with these people I love so much.
Current Location: Home
Current Mood:  loved
Current Music: The sound of the birds outside
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08:24 pm
[Link] | All I can say is so much for my quiet weekend. I knew it wasn't going to really be a quiet one as I was always planning to go to dropzone but I figured I would have a couple of drinks on my way home from work and then sit and watch films. Alas it was not to be I ran into byteback so stayed and talked to him. Rob started playing table football with the pros in the Rising at which point I figured I would be there for a while (its not like its the first time I have been ignored for that table football). By the time I got home at 2am I was really very drunk.
Despite this I got still went to dropzone (I normally don't have the stamina for 2 nights in a row). I was 45min late to the pub on the way there and for this I apologise deeply to all those who were waiting for me I really didn't meant to be that late. There is only so much I remember about dropzone which is odd as I drank fairly little (I think!). My resounding memories are of the dance floor which is apparently where I was for most of the night (I remember going to dance at 1 and then it being 3 so I was there a while). The only other thing I really remember is being told by one of the barmaids that I looked great which absolutely made my night.
Now all I have to do is work the knots out of my muscles in time for next month.
Current Location: Home
Current Mood: content
Current Music: Apoptygma Berzerk
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08:05 pm
[Link] |  | You scored as Blade. Thats right you are the booty kicking you cross me and I will stomp a mudhole in your butt type. Sexy and a great fighter with mad fighting skills
Blade | | 92% | Armand | | 83% | Deacon Frost | | 83% | Marius | | 75% | Dracula | | 75% | Akasha | | 67% | Spike | | 50% | Angel | | 42% | Louis | | 42% | Lestat | | 25% | </td>
Whose your Vampire personality? (images)
created with QuizFarm.com |
I think Rob and I should swap.
I would look better in the metal bikini!!!
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07:59 pm
[Link] |  | You scored as Angel. Angel: Angels are the guardians of all things, from the smallest ant to the tallest tree. They give inspiration, love, hope, and positive emotion. They live among humans without being seen. They are the good in all things, and if you feel alone, don't fear. They are always watching. Often times they merely stand by, whispering into the ears of those who feel lost. They would love nothing more then to reveal themselves, but in today's society, this would bring havoc and many unneeded questions. Give thanks to all things beautiful, for you are an Angel.
Angel | | 83% | Mermaid | | 75% | Dragon | | 58% | Faerie | | 58% | WereWolf | | 50% | Demon | | 33% | </td>
What Mythological Creature are you? (Cool Pics!)
created with QuizFarm.com |
Current Mood: sleepy
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10:21 pm
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alysha_t took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test! "Wants contentment, physical ease, and the absence ..."
Click here to read the rest of the results.
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